By his side

They had shared evenings, afternoons, mornings, sunrises and sunsets. They had shared almost everything to friends can share. But feelings. They didn't share their feelings, for one of them saw the other as a friend, while the other was in love.

They had known each other since they were 6, they had gone to school together, they had gone to highschool together and, when the time came, they became flatmates. One of them went out with a different girl each night, while the other sat on the sofa watching tv trying to ignore the escapades of the friend. Mike would share his stories about the girls he was going out with, but he could not see what was happening in front of him.

The first time Tom realized he loved Mike he was horrified. It was not the first time he was in love with a boy, but Mike was his closest friend, he didn't know how to confess his feelings to him. It was just too much. He decided that he'd rather keep him as a friend that tell him he loved him. And he did for some years. But then something happened.

Mike had a really bad breakup with a girl he had been going out with for some months. When Tom got home he found Mike terribly drunk.
"Mike, Mike" he said shacking his friend "what are you doing?"
Mike tried to focus his gaze and stared at him not even knowing who he was.
"MIKE" Tom shouted this time slapping across his friend's face.
This time Mike reacted.
"Why the hell did you do that?"
"Haven't you seen yourself? You stink of alcohol! What happened?"
Mike started to cry.
"Giselle leeeeeft meeee" he said sobbing "I thought we were doing pretty well, but all this time she was cheating on me"
"Mike, calm down, you'll find someone else"
"No, there's no one else there for me... No one will ever love me, I'll die alone" he told his friend holding back his tears.
Tom realized that it was past time he told Mike his feelings for him.
"No, you won't. I'll be there for you forever. I'll take care of you. And I'll be there when you die. I love you Mike, I've loved you for years. I've loved you in silence seeing you loving other peoplr. But I've kept on loving you. Nothing you do or say can change this."
Mike stoped crying and his eyes found Tom's.
"I can see in your eyes that what you say is true. I'm sad I can't love you so. I wisg I could, though. I wish I could. You're the only person who has been by my side always all these years, the only one who listened to my problems and helped me out. My closest friend, better than family. And yet, when you give me love I can only give you friendship and the promise to stand by your side whenever you need me. I'm so sad it's the only thing I can give you. So sad."
Tom wasn't surprised that Mike had told him that he couldn't love him, he knew that already. But he was glad that he would have his friendship for as long as they were alive, at least he would have him by his side.